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Dec 28, 2005
SMOKE YOUR MARIJUANADEY
So we’ve reached the final week of the NFL’s regular season. Normally a time for reflection, remorse, and a little regurgitation for us Bengal fans. But not this year. Despite a Chernobyl-esque meltdown last week against the Bills, our boys are headed to the playoffs for the first time since Knots Landing was a hit tv show and Poison had a #1 single. We’ve suffered through a lot of crap over the last fifteen years- Dave Shula, Akili Smith, David Klingler, Bruce Coslet, James Francis, Rod “Toast” Jones, Fat Daddy, Vagina Carter, and on, and on, and on…..
But today is not a day to look back, rather it’s a day to celebrate and look forward to even brighter days ahead. Let’s celebrate what the Black Jesus has brought to us. Let’s celebrate the rifle arm of Carson Palmer, the sure hands of TJ Houshmanzedeh, the acrobatic & bombastic Chad Johnson, the bull-dozing Willie Anderson, the ball-hawking Deltha O’Neal, the smashmouth running of Rudi Johnson, the tenacity of Odell Thurman, and the accuracy of Shayne Graham. Yes, I say let’s celebrate. Let’s celebrate the end of Cincinnati’s Great Football Depression, and let’s celebrate it with a song. With apologies to Adam Sandler and to the sacred days of Hannukah, here goes……..
There's a lot of football songs out there,
But not too many Cincinnati Bengal songs.
So uh..
I wrote a song for all those long-suffering Bengal fans who haven’t gotten to stand up and shout for a while.
Here we go...
Put on your Bengal gear
Here comes the Who Dey cheer
It’s so much fun-a-dey
To shout for the Bengals today
Who Dey is….. the cheer of Cincinnati
Instead of “Rah” or “Go Team”, we have this crazy ebonical skatty
So when you feel like the only person, cheering the Bengals to victory,
Here's a list of people who are also Bengal fans just like you and meeeeeee..….
Sarah Jessica Parker, wears orange & black on Sundays
So do George Clooney, Bootsy Collins, and the late Doris Day-ey
Guess who eats together at the Gold Star Chil-ey
It’s the Hit King, Pete Rose and our former mayor, Jerry Springerdey
Peter Frampton's wife’s a Bengals fan, Joe Torre’s is as well
Neither one of them’s very pretty but Bengal-lovin’ Carmen Electra’s hot as hell
You don't need "Luv ya Blue" or "the Super Bowl Shuffle"
'Cause you can rock the joint with Guns n Roses’- “Welcome to the Jungle”
Put on your Bengal gear
It's time for the Who Dey cheer
The owner of Chiquita Banana-dey
Has stripes painted on his wrinkly old face today
Rosie O’Donnell, …….not a Bengal fan
But guess who is? The first man on the moon- Neil Armstrong
We got ESPN’s Dan Patrick, CNN’s Bill Hemmer, too
WKRP’s Dr. Johnny Fever, and the drummer who Fights the Foo
Some people think, that Jessica Simpson is
Well she's not, but guess who is
Both of her boobs is………….and her ex-husband, too
So many stars like to yell "Who Dey!"
Drew Carey isn't, but that’s okay because he’s gay
Tell your friend Sha-neyney
It's time to yell out "Who Dey!"
I hope they play Super Bowl Sun-a-day
And knock the snot out of the Seahawkadeys
So drink your old six pack of Hu-dey beer today
And smoke your marijuanidey
If you really, really wannadey…….
Have a happy, happy, happy, happy Who Dey Day
Who Dey, Who Dey, Who Dey think gonna beat dem Bengals?!……..NOOOOOOOOBODY!!
On with the Matchups........
Broncos at Chargers-
Giants at Raiders-
Cardinals at Colts-
Ravens at Browns-
Bills at Jets-
Panthers at Falcons-
Bengals at Chiefs-
Lions at Steelers-
Dolphins at Patriots-
Saints at Bucs-
Seahawks at Packers-
Texans at Niners-
Titans at Jaguars-
Bears at Vikings-
Redskins at Eagles-
Rams at Cowboys-
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